How to Schmooze at a Convention, Even if You’re Shy

The shy person’s guide to event schmoozing

Shyness can be debilitating, and it can range from slight nerves, to full on terror. I am a shy girl reformed, and so I feel quite well qualified to discuss this subject.

I know what it’s like to freeze and shake, and have people point, wondering why you can’t hold a limb still in social situations, however I am also standing proof that it can be conquered! How? Well, it’s about realising your own power, and although that can be hard to do at first, practice certainly does make perfect.

When it comes to schmoozing at conferences and events, this can be a shy person’s nightmare, but the key is to remain calm, be prepared, and basically fake it like you’re confident. If you fake it for long enough, you’ll eventually feel it yourself, and it can even be as simple as body language – hold your head up high, maintain eye contact, and keep your shoulders back. This can even go as far as what you wear – power dressing is called that for a reason! Just don’t go as far shoulder pads, there’s never really an excuse for those.

Keep it small, don’t try and climb mountains

As with anything in life that scares us, it’s best to break it down to small, bite-sized chunks. You wouldn’t consider pushing a full orange in your mouth would you? Of course not, you break it up. So in this case, don’t attempt to walk into the room and dazzle everyone straight away with big speeches; instead ask questions, ask people you know to introduce you to others, and keep what you do say short.  Short and impressive, is better than long and waffly. Also, remember your manners, be friendly and likeable.

Prepare an introduction

I’m not suggesting you prepare a speech, a la your foreign language speaking exam, but having a pre-prepared introduction of yourself, which can be tweaked depending on the situation will announce your entrance and give an air of confidence, even if you’re feeling anything but. Just a few details about who you are, what you’re there for, who you work for, what you do etc.

Fake it

Like we discussed before, this is one of those situations in life where it’s perfectly accepted to fake it. Fake confidence and after a little while you’ll feel it anyway. It’s like reverse psychology – become an Oscar winning actor or actress in your own right. Smile, nod, look interest in what other people say. Just remember there is also a fine line between confidence and arrogance, so make sure you tread on the right side of the line.

It’s their loss

If your schmoozing fails, which occasionally it will, then simply shrug it off and move on. Not everyone will want to hear what you say, and not everyone will be responsive, but hey, their loss, right? Move onto your next target.

Preparation is everything

There is nothing geeky about preparation! Write lists, research the people that will be attending (and I don’t mean stalk them, just general information will do!), find out the main big-hitters and find things you can ask. These events are all about networking, and finding out information beforehand will stand you in better stead, and arm you with questions and subjects to discuss when you fake that confidence!

Shyness is difficult, but it can be beaten. Don’t let it get in the way of your business and networking needs – fake it, and shine!

photo credit: <a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/alyssafilmmaker/3788674919/”>Alyssa L. Miller</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a> <a href=”http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/”>cc</a>